it's time

My Dear Friends and Family,

God is amazing, creative, wonderful, just and (thankfully) uses us no matter what. Most of you are familiar with my past... and know that there were some years that I made God really work. And I (and Matt) are still bearing the consequences because of those early life choices.

This current season in life we are praising God for using me (us) still and turning ashes into beauty and... well... molding me into who I am today. He's an amazing potter! Never once, through it all, have i wavered in WHO GOD IS. Even in the lowest of lows... I have, however, questioned Him with the looming question, WHAT IS MY PURPOSE?? 

Looking back at the journey that God has led me through...I KNOW WHO I AM IN CHRIST! There has been a battle going on for about a year, to my very core...  I have felt pulled and pushed and at times it has literally felt like I have been wrestling with "WHAT IS MY PURPOSE?" 

A year ago, I felt a weight on my shoulders that I have never experienced before and I cried out to God. I didn't know what to do...  I cried out to my husband (who, praise God, is a man who's striving after God's heart and could handle "this season").  Matt suggested that I meet with a very strong, mature in Christ, woman of Faith. God led me to my mentor who is a "forever" family friend, who seeks Christ daily. Together we wrestled "this" and poured it out at Christ's feet. This is the first season in my life that I have realized that there is a battle going on... a bigger battle than we can comprehend...  "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." (Ephesians 6:12) 

I have never struggled with depression. After meeting with my mentor during our weekly Bible study, it became clear that I was battling a spirit of oppression, not depression. She recommended that every time I felt this "weight", to pray for someone that I normally do not pray for and to announce my intent and PRAY! I did. The weight I was battling for a year was lifted! "IT" is GONE!  P R A I S E   G O D!! I give God all the glory!

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." (John 16:33)

Through this trial... season of pruning... time... I have come to realize that satan does not stop. He keeps on tempting, threatening, lying, deceiving, manipulating. Once we conquer and overcome one "area" in our lives... something else will come up as a stumbling block! But... I AM AWARE... I AM READY TO RUN THIS RACE!  

Where does this bring me now? Well... there is an urgency in my heart to share "this", to share my journey with Christ with other women. 

About a month ago, I met with a cherished friend, Jennifer Wagenmaker, she has a uncanny, extremely similar, journey to mine... our stories intertwined about... shesh... how many years ago? Eleven years ago. (YIKES!) We realized that we both have this burning, KNOWING, desire to share our stories with others. We fasted and prayed and God has IMPRINTED HIS WORDS ON OUR HEARTS. He revealed our ministry:

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! 18All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: 19that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. (2 Corinthians 5:17-19)

Who we are going to pour Christ out to:

3Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. (Titus 2:3-5)

God is MOVING!!! The story for my life for Christ is being pruned... I'm ready to be a moving vessel for God!!!! I know I'm going to talk to girls at youth groups... meet with them... have one on one time. I'm ready to share my story with mother's... grandmothers... women of faith! I'm ready to start talking to my fellow thirty year olds and twenty somethings about what God CRAVES for their life... hope.. a new beginning... something HUGE and BEAUTIFUL and full of LIFE! Every time I open up God's word another message of reconciliation and hope pops out... screaming to be heard... 

What can you do? Pray. Ask God what He wants from you... 

Pray. 

Pray for Jen and I as God leads us where to go... who to talk too. How God is going to use us.

Pray... pray that satan will be left in the dust and WILL NOT have a foothold.

Pray for our families (YOU) and friends (YOU) to be protected and be supportive.  

Pray for a hedge of protection for my family. 

Pray for a hedge of protection for Jen's family.

Pray. Praise JESUS for VICTORY and RECONCILIATION!!!!!

So excited for this next season in my life. So excited to share this season with YOU!

And I'm also ready and excited to kick satan in the butt!!! 

Loving my savior... my redeemer and friend, Jesus.

<3 always,

Tana Schwemin